eeveee | A Good, Christian Boy (Hetalia: England, America, and the Organisation of American States)

Kink meme fill: Puritan!America is switched with his modern day self.

"England," there was tugging on his sleeve. There had been a great deal of tugging on his sleeve today, but not yet insistent enough to nearly rip of its sturdy seams. "England, why are we talking to Indians?"

"That's Bolivia, America. You shouldn't be calling her 'Indian'; you and she are not on the best terms at the moment."

"Can you even be on good terms with an Indian, England?" the sneer in the boy's voice caught him off guard, "England, why - "

"America," he interrupted, turning around and taking the boy's hand off his forearm, "no 'Indians' today. You and I are here to explain the problem, and let them know that your brother will be along soon to hopefully take the lead. No speaking to anyone in particular, and no politics."

"England? What the hell are you doing here?"

And oh, how England wanted to cringe when the boy jumped at the sight of Cuba, eyes wide mouth firmly closed. Cuba, for his part, blinked, and reached down to ruffle America's hair. "And you brought the little one along, too! Finally getting acknowledged for something, huh?"

"That's not - it's a long story, and I need to have words with him, excuse us." Recent civilities or not, England wasn't so sure how good Cuba could keep his temper in check around the young America.

"England!" the boy whisper-shrieked, "England, that's a - "

"That's Cuba. He is good friends with Canada and you only recently started talking to him for the first time in sixty years. Let's try to keep up the good tone, shall we? No pointing."

"Why would I talk to a -"

"They're all good Christians, now be calm."

"Are they really?"

"Of course they are, most of them are Catholic, and they never lapsed like France and - "

"Catholic?! England, haven't we even defeated the Popery yet?! You just said they were Christians, you did!"

There was staring, now, as most members of the Organisation of American States had filed into the room during the last couple of minutes. England forced a smile, and tugged America into the hallway. His hand smarted from America's iron grip on it, but since the boy looked like he trapped in a room with wild animals, he should probably be counting it as a blessing that there was no bigger scene yet.

"America," he started, leaning down to catch the boy's eyes, "America, be quiet and listen to me." the boy was still heaving, and England gripped his shoulders, shook them hard, once, and finally got the boy's attention. "America, listen closely. A lot of things have changed, you know that. You've been a very good boy, and dealt very well with that."

America nodded, and England relaxed his grip, rubbed the boy's shoulders, and continued. "Now, things have changed in regards to Christ as well. In this age, Catholics are just as Christian as Protestants."

There was a long, long silence. And then: "What kind of world is this?"

"One that has changed," England answered, and out of a millennia of habitual prayer, found himself sending an unspoken inquiry to a god he didn't much believe in these days that he would not have to explain to America who Israel was and why he was so vexed with him at the moment. He shook the thought away, and stood up to take America's hand once more. "So will you promise to behave yourself? No pointing, no shouting, no staring. Some of them might not be very friendly, but you're very... important in their lives," no need to specify why as long as they were willing to let bygones be bygones, "so please be a good boy for a little while more."

America nodded, and followed England without a word as he re-entered the room, and stepped up to stand behind America's vacant chair. The chatter that had been buzzing around them stilled, but he still coughed just for good measure, and put a hand on America's shoulder.

"I'll be brief - there was an accident and America," he pulled the boy a little closer to the table, "is not - as I am sure you all can see - in any form for leading your meeting here today. Canada will be along shortly and hopefully, things will go along fine. Until then, please let unofficial contact with the United States go through the diplomatic channels, and he'll get back to you once he is back to normal. The Council of Europe and the Arab League have already been informed of this, as has a number of individual states. If it persists much longer, we will probably have to call a world summit, but we're hoping that this is only a temporal state."

He did not ask if there were any questions, and the silence around the table lingered until Venezuela - and wasn't that just England's luck - opened her mouth.

"So you're telling me that the jerk finally got what he had coming?"

England would have said something about what you said to children and what you did not, but he didn't get the chance. America, whether it was out of the stress of situation or that Christian zealousness that England never had known how to cope with, broke all promises of being a good boy with a statement that was eerily similar in tone to how he later would - had been - oh, talking about Russia and his household.

"I don't have to listen to the vile accusations of a beastly race that was sent by Satan to stop me from doing God's work!"

"Yes," said England after thirty seconds of stunned silence, gripped America's hand again and yanked him along as he left the room, "he'll let you know when he's back to normal."

I shan't lie: this was brought to you by my academical pursuits, which recently included some rather heavy reading on the Pilgrims.

Those kooky Puritans thought that the Indians were in cahoots with Satan, and were not any friendlier with the Jews than your average European even though they believed themselves to be re-enacting the tale of the Israeli Exodus. And, you know. The founding principle of the Puritan colonies was to get those blaspheming papists out of their hair.